Being happy in your life

(This is an article I wrote for a web page with this title)

You want to be happy in your life?  You must not have even one expectation.   Having expectations are what causes the majority of the misery and failures in our lives. 
I am not speaking of plans or goals.  In our society, we all need to have intentions, strategies and objectives, otherwise there would be complete chaos.  I am talking about envisioning how you think people or circumstances should be, then assume real life will have exactly the same image or outcome.  This scenario sets us up for disappointment every time.


For an example, when you meet someone and you like the way they look, you begin to form an expectation in your mind, of the way you want your life to play out with this person, whether its a phone call the next day, a date the next week or walking down the aisle the next year. 

As the encounter progresses, you talk, you laugh, you exchange phone numbers, then as you say goodbye, you begin to form a story line in your head of the conversation you will have when they call the next day.  If they do not call, you are full of disillusionment because life did not go as you had planned.  (if your plans went as far as what color the bridesmaid's dresses would be, you will also be full of rage at this point)


I believe, if you could stay in the present moment and be content with what is really happening, events would naturally evolve and have a better chance of a positive conclusion. 
Just as a step toward happiness, think about what makes you smile, things that you have in your life right now, that give you joy (even if it is as simple as a good cup of coffee) and begin to feel grateful for what you already have instead of always searching for something bigger or better. Accept everything as it truly is and not try to mold it into what you would prefer, then embrace the similarities and the contrasts or move in a different direction. 

Nothing will ever be perfect.  Life is not meant to be perfect.  We are messy, mixed up, beautiful souls, trying our best to make sense of this life.  Now, if you can look at a person from that vantage point, perhaps that person can exceed your expectations and turn out to be a pleasant surprise.